A cliche, I know, but the contrasting mish-mash of tracks sent me spinning into a mega nostalgia trip. 'Dub Be Good To Me' by Beats International, 'Groove Is In The Heart' by Deee-Lite and ' I Wanna Give You Devotion' by Nomad reminded me of the transition from middle school to upper school and a pretty miserable time - my parents had just split up and I was also verbally bullied by class'mates' for a period and I felt and looked hideous. They say that schooldays are the best of your life; mine certainly weren't. I couldn't even escape it outside of school for a while. An excellent string of performances for my Sunday football team led me to representing the Northampton league in a four-way county tournament, but that meant playing alongside a bunch of wankers. They all clearly knew each other from previous seasons as cliques dominated, and I might as well have worn a t-shirt with the slogan Outsider > Vulnerable as they tore me to pieces with banter, and not nice banter.
The sixth-form was better, though; you could wear jeans, socialise in the common room, enjoy free periods (sorry, STUDY periods) and get into clubs and get pissed - mostly to tunes like 'I Luv U Baby' by The Original, 'The Bomb' by Bucketheads and 'Dreamer' by Livin' Joy. Outside of school I also enjoyed possibly my favourite football era playing for Fiveways, a team built from scratch within the space of a month. It wasn't all great, though. I failed my driving test five times while others breezed through theirs first time, and girls were a complete enigma. Even those I got on with had reputations for bitching behind others' backs and romance was completely off the radar. To be perfectly honest I didn't realise girls could be nice until I went to uni...
As for most people uni was a life-changing experience - living away from home and looking after oneself for the first time; endless student nights; money-management; random snogs. So many memories - laughs in the common room ('Spaceman' by Babylon Zoo); being in love in the summer of 96 ('Before' by Pet Shop Boys); clubbing ('Children' by Robert Miles and 'Insomnia' by Faithless); our legendary student union weekly piss-up known as "Shipwrecked" ('Never Forget' by Take That); late-night wistful thinking ('The Masterplan' by Oasis). This was just the first year.
It quietened down a bit after that, of course. No more living on campus, the student union and "Shipwrecked" were no longer ours, nights out became far less frequent, and rowdy common room banter was now lighthearted chat in front of Countdown and Neighbours. "Bangin' choons" were also replaced by more introspective and frankly much better music, with 'What Do You Want From Me' by Monaco, 'Your Woman' by White Town and 'Monday Morning, 5:19' by Rialto echoing a period of slightly more intense study as I attempted to decipher my own lecture notes in the bedroom. 'Little Britain' by Dreadzone was a sinister reminder of the habitual weekly late-night viewing of Southend United's latest disaster in Endsleigh League Extra.
As I ponder my next move in life at the age of 33, it's this late-90s period that appears to want to suck me back to the decade the most. I have no job to get up for, daytime TV is back on the menu, I still can't drive (though circumstances have forced this), I still listen to Pet Shop Boys, Faithless and Take That, and Southend are in Division 4. Perhaps it was better back then. I was young, didn't have health issues, the charts were still listenable, Countdown was hosted by Richard Whiteley, and I could go out with a tenner and still come home with change to spare.
On the flipside, I now no longer have an overdraft, I'm much less angst-ridden, I'm much better looking and I have the love of a great woman. Take That told us to never forget where we've come here from, and my playlist obliged. But as great as 'Groove Is In The Heart', 'I Luv You Baby', 'Insomnia' and 'Monday Morning, 5:19' were, and still are, memories are mixed and nostalgia is not ultimately fulfilling. There's plenty I would change if I could go back but life is a learning curve and hindsight isn't in the future tense.